Tag Archives: Amara Simba

Lord Sugar To Buy Leyton Orient

13 Oct
Lord Davies, Lord Sugar and Lady Vadera

Lord Sugar models next season Orient kit

Well this time last week, Lord Sugar was taking to the media promoting his autobiography and new show on Talksport. Hang on, that’s Essex boy and hammers fan Russel Brand. No, Lord Sugar was plugging his book and the new series of the Apprentice on BBC1. (The establishment can’t trust Mr Brand on the main channel JUST YET – too soon after Sachsgate)

During the interviews with the Sun, BBC Breakfast and 5live,  ‘Sur Alan’ compared the LIb Dems in government to Leyton Orient in the champions league – a fish out of water (Champion League – your having a laugh, we can’t even get through to the later stages of the Johnstone Paint Trophy).

Then, during saturdays 5live commentary of Sheffield Wednesday v The O’s,  Connor Macnamara said that in another interview, when asked was  Jose Mourinho the special one, Sugar replied “Get him down Leyton Orient, and see if he’s the special one” It’s a fair comment in relation to many managers who moan they need to spend more money to compete in the premier or champions league.

But it appears that Lord Sugar has got his local team, our beloved Leyton Orient on the brain, or under his skin.

After the Lib Dem story I tweeted his Lordship the Baron of Clapton, but no reply.  Maybe he doesn’t want the big story to break just yet. He has stated in his book and on telly that buying Tottenham Hotspur was the biggest (business) mistake of his career, so the chance of him ploughing his millions into another football club, two divisions lower, when he could be relaxing on his yacht or at his californian home watching back episodes of CSI, but he might be thinking he has unfinished business in football, and what better stage than his local team,  with less expectations, but with huge potential.I have it on good authority that he (and his son) had looked over the orient accounts in the past after selling Spurs, but no bid was forthcoming at that time. After donating a million pound to the Hackney Empire after selling Spurs I remarked that he was transferring money from one comedy club to another, but now might be the time for the real fun to start…

Orient are used to being linked with profile players, managers and owners… Peter Shilton, Ray Wilkins, Amara Simba, Alvin Martin, Joe Kinnear, Barry Hearn, David Beckham, Terry Byrne, Michael Barrymore

Lord Sugar to buy Leyton Orient from Uncle Barry (Hearn) YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST…



L.Orient banned from entering transfer market after poaching French players

14 Sep

Leyton Orient, the little known east london club who play on the site of a future supermarket and are twinned with French Giants Lorient (club motto – because they’re worth it) have been handed a world record 10 year ban in the transfer market after illegally approaching, attempting to sign, and generally poaching like eggs the cream of the French Cheese market in Calais.

Take That

Take That

Orient chairman Harry Byrne and Chief Executive Column Writer Mort Pinter acted under cover by opening a warehouse named “Eastenders” in Calais where they sold cheap booze, and English people flocked in their thousands to buy the bargains in January and August.

The scam was discoverd when a french employee, known locally as Len, revealed what his bosses were doing by inadvertedly posting information on Fraisebook and Tweeter (the french versions of Friends Re-United and Myspace)

The full list of players poached by L.Orient is as follows….

Loick Pires (brother of Robert)
Paul Thierry (brother of John Henry)
Stephane Purchase
Rianne Jarvis
Jerome Jones (gk)
Thierry Mkandawire
Jerome Ibehere
Jason Jean (JJ) Melligan
Sasha Opinell
Simone Church
Michel’ Simpson
Zinedane Zakuani
Amara Simba
Magno Vierra
That Other one from the Calais amatuer team

Manager Gerard Williams slammed FIFA and was quoted as saying “Sacre Blue” before eating an onion and crying real tears and cycling off down the louvre…

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